Thursday, September 27, 2007♥
Its a wonder how a small thing can cook up a storm in someone's life. It was supposed to be a small thing, at least I thought. But somehow, someone never fail to disrupt peace in my life. And its just so irritating. For once, I did not know who to turn to. I had reservations about almost every single person I thought I could talk to. So that leaves me with no one to talk to. And you know in times like this, I would really appreciate no questions ask. I will sort it out myself. And to begin with, its really a thing so small one would hardly take notice so yup, don't bother.
On another note, my ah ma is going for her knee operation in less than a month's time, after years of procratination. And being the worry freak I always am, I can't help worrying about everything, ranging from who's going to accompany her in the hospital to, of course, the success of the whole thing, how long it will take before she can walk normally again etc. And I can't display my worries in front of her because I know it took her lots of courage to do this. Somehow old people are kinda against going under the knife. Its just normal. And I don't want to add on to her fear which she also has been trying to hide.
You know I have always been a darling to her, and she brings me around, travelling with her since I was young. And you know how in a tour, people always make comment about "wah, you bring your grand-daughter with you ah" and stuff like that. And a reply she made stayed etched in my heart. "Yah lor, don't know next time when I'm old already, will she do the same to me." You know how certain things people say never get removed from your life? This is one sentence which I somehow never forget over these years. And so I hope this op puts an end to all her pain so that I can fulfil this duty of mine.
Somehow there are just too many things troubling me recently. And whether I am going for exchange is an issue which has been bouncing to and fro. When I think I have decided, something has to come along to make me reconsider. So it just keeps coming back and forth. And its just so infuriating.
I guess I am just in a "life sucks" phase which I am optimistic that I'll be over it soon.
